Heloise and Abelard

Heloise and Abelard’s love story is a story of passion, loss, separation and the triumph of a higher love that unites lovers into eternity. Heloise lived in the 12^th century and was the niece of a canon of the Notre Dame of Paris named Fulbert. Abelard was a reputable scholar and was hired by Heloise’s uncle to be her private tutor. Heloise was intelligent and beautiful and Abelard who was 18 years her senior, was a brilliant philosopher and theologian.  They had an instant connection and strong physical attraction to each other. Heloise was taken by his brilliance and knowledge. Abelard met an intellectual match and a great beauty. They had fallen deeply in love with each other and their forbidden love affair lead to scandalous and tragic consequences.  Fulbert who was both jealous and possessive of his niece, discovered the affair when Heloise became pregnant. He was infuriated and sent Heloise off to a convent, where she stayed for the remainder of her life. In his vengeance towards Abelard, Fulbert hired a thug to attack and castrate him. Abelard whose reputation was already ruined went to serve in a monastery, deciding to dedicate his life to God and penitence for his sins.

Though Heloise and Abelard only saw each other briefly one more time,  they continued to correspond for another 20 years, leaving their Love letters as a testament to their undying love for each other,  while dedicating their life to God.

Here are some excerpts of their correspondence with each other.

Heloise writes

"Heloise! as long as thou drawest a breath it is decreed thou must love Abelard."  

“You know, beloved, as the whole world knows, how much I have lost in you, how at one wretched stroke of fortune that supreme act of flagrant treachery robbed me of my very self in robbing me of you..”

“Even into holy places before the altar I carry the memory of our love, and far from lamenting for having been seduced by pleasures, I sigh for having lost them. I remember (for nothing is forgot by lovers) the time and place in which you first declared your passion and swore you would love me till death. Your words, your oaths, are deeply graven in my heart. My stammering speech betrays to all the disorder of my mind; my sighs discover me, and your name is ever on my lips. O Lord! when I am thus afflicted why dost not Thou pity my weakness and strengthen me with Thy grace? “

Abelard writes

“I promise myself that I will forget you, and yet cannot think of it without loving you. My love is not at all lessened by those reflections I make in order to free myself. “

"I incessantly seek for you in my mind; I recall your image in my memory, and in different disquietudes I betray and contradict myself. I hate you! I love you! “

" I continually think of you; I continually call to mind your tenderness. In this condition, O Lord! if I run to prostrate myself before your altar, if I beseech you to pity me, why does not the pure flame of the Spirit consume the sacrifice that is offered? Cannot this habit of penitence, which I wear interest Heaven to treat me more favorably? But Heaven is still inexorable because my passion still lives in me; the fire is only covered over with deceitful ashes, and cannot be extinguished but by extraordinary grace. "

In their letters they continue to express an outpouring of their love towards each other, seeking wisdom and understanding. In one letter Abelard questions how Heloise could continue to be in Love with him, when he is no longer able to make love to her.  She replied that she loved him from a higher part in herself where her love was a permanent resident and was beyond sexual desire or contact. They continued to live in each other’s soul and memories and their letters continued to fuel the flames of their hearts. They both recognized that the powerful energy of their love was propelling their very existence. It became the kind of love that did not require physical presence, or sexual union to stay alive and continue to grow. It was a Divine Love where they felt the union of their souls until their last days on earth.

Several hundred years later, Josephine Bonaparte who was inspired by their love story decided to exhume their bodies so that they could be buried together. Until today, lovers pay homage to this famous couple at the well-known tomb in the cemetery of Pere Lachaise near Paris.

May their story continue to inspire all of us to honor and cherish Love.